Writers aren't exactly people, they're a lot of people trying to be one person. F.Scott Fitzgerald

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Do two parents raise a healthier child and would you like a do over?

       I just watched a movie about a grieving father trying to raise his two sons alone. Now,he does the best he can and makes lot's of mistakes. Good lord, two parents raising their children make a lot of mistakes,but the difference is they have someone to watch their back. Children need two parents.Preferably a father and a mother.I think they need the balance of male and female energy. I'm not saying two same sex parents can't raise healthy,happy children. I firmly believe children are emotionally and mentally healthier and better able to cope with life when they have a mentally healthy,emotionally mature mother and father as role models raising them.
    That being said, I had neither.I had a mentally ill,alcoholic,war veteran for a father and a bitter emotionally distant mother until I was eleven.Then my mother married her wealthy boss and spent the next twenty five years of her life basking in her prestige and home full of expensive possessions.
    I grew up in the midst of this household,dearly loved by my stepfather and basking in his attention.I learned possessions,wealth,prestige meant everything. Then I married a stocker in a grocery store,because he was gorgeous and drove a fancy car. Six years and two babies later I had only the two dependent babies and moved back home.I didn't know how to be poor again, raise two babies by myself or how to cope. I survived. I worked hard and remarried but I had no idea how to love, how to believe in love or how to be a giving partner.
   I ended up,having two more children,raising four children with the help of my husband and being fairly happy for twenty three years. Now I am alone,older and wiser when it is too late.. Would I have been better prepared and more emotionally stable with two loving mentally and emotionally stable parents? I think so,but I'll never know. It's a shame God doesn't give us a do over. Would I do better? I like to think so. Would you take a do over if you could?

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